When I moved to South Korea for a 12-month teaching contract, I didn’t have any social media accounts and in fact, Facebook had just recently been expanded to everyone in comparison to just college students. Getting documentation as a foreigner is difficult in South Korea and for an entire month, I didn’t have internet access or a phone or access to social media. I struggled to get connected in a country where I wasn’t familiar with the language or food or the town I lived in suddenly. So, I felt like I was on a grand adventure, wandering the streets of rural South Korea, totally disconnected and alone. I didn’t know a soul and I had no way of connecting with locals and other foreigners in my town unless I physically ran into someone at the grocery store or on the street. So, I can definitely relate to Paul Miller’s article in The Verge, where he disconnected from all technology for a year.
Even though I eventually got a flip phone with the help of a local Korean who was bilingual. And, I was eventually able to get internet set up with the help of my employer. And, I was eventually able to Skype once a week with friends and family back in the U.S. And, I eventually discovered that my rural South Korean town connected foreigners and English speakers with a Facebook group (the reason why I initially signed up for Facebook)…I felt like I was finally alive with no electronic distractions at first, tasting new foods, seeing foreign things and experiencing new things like a young child experiences the world for the first time.
Once I finally got access to the internet and a phone to connect with other foreigners that I’d meet in town from Facebook events, I wanted to get to know people organically. I posted minimal information about myself online and had the freedom to choose the version of myself that I wanted to start fresh with. Everyone’s first questions were “Where are you from?” and “What brought you to Korea?” I experimented with different responses in-person and different portrayals of myself online. As a Marketing major from college, I knew I was more or less branding myself.
As someone in the age group that grew up both with and without the internet, I am private, but participate online just enough to where it helps me connect personally and professionally. However, I can see that social media has its privacy concerns. Like Facebook or Instagram owning your photography and using your personal data to sell to third party advertisers. Should we really divulge our true selves online? Or, should we mold a slightly true online persona for ourselves without publicly posting everything about yourself?
I can recall an incident where a British expat friend abroad stole a unique winter landscape photo that I had taken in a small, hard to get to, town in South Korea. He copied my photo straight off my Facebook photo album and claimed the photo as his own, posting it on his Facebook wall. I had told him, over drinks, the previous week, about my solo adventure to that city and I had posted a few photos online. I found out he had taken my photo, without my permission, by perusing his Facebook page. When I asked him about it, he denied it, but couldn’t name the city that the photo was taken in. I immediately reported him for copyright infringement to Facebook, who removed my photo from his page. I am always careful about what I post online because of this incident. He was simply building a South Korean persona for his friends and family back home to envy. But, how far is too far where our artistic work and privacy is concerned?
1. Are you being so bombarded by social media that you’re not able to enjoy real life?:
Have you ever been visiting with a friend you haven’t seen for a while out to eat or having coffee and they are hooked to their phone the entire time, checking notifications and texting? I think we all have. It’s impossible to connect when you’re constantly being distracted and showing another person that they’re basically not interesting enough. When visiting with people or in conversation, put all of your electronic devices away and enjoy the moment. You may be surprised at how nice it is to take a slower pace and just be with someone else.
2. Social media is a waste of time:
Now that I’m in graduate school, I have even LESS time than the small amount of free time I had before. Working full time and going to school full time, staying healthy and trying to stay connected to friends and family leaves little time left over. I often find myself thinking, is this half hour of Netflix worth it? How could I be better utilizing my time or multi-tasking? If given the opportunity, I try to choose things that must be done, like cleaning the house, or a fun, social activity where I get to interact with other real life humans. Will the activity you’re doing online feel like a waste of time tomorrow or next week?
3. Are you online simply to get online social approval?:
While it’s absolutely fine to post photos or thoughts on Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest or any other number of social media apps, there is a difference between a healthy distraction and an addiction. If you’re looking for imaginary internet points or “likes” rather than just being happy with what you’re doing in the moment, it may be time to take a step back.
4. Social Media makes us compare our lives to other’s:
If you find yourself having conflicted feelings about other’s online lives or you constantly must post what you’re doing to show that your life is great for your online acquaintances, then you may be getting a distorted view of online life. Try doing activities away from your computer or smartphone, like going outside or catching up with a friend. It has been proven that those who check in on Facebook too often exhibit more signs of anxiety and depression than those who don’t.
5. Are people’s online personalities really who they are?
Remember that online personas are only a small glimpse of people’s real lives. You may be seeing photos and posts about other’s grand trips abroad, engagements and promotions, but you’re not usually seeing the negative aspects of their lives. Take social media with a grain of salt and live your life doing what makes you grow, happy and satisfied.
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